Arsenal v Portsmouth, 15:00
Portsmouth seem a broken team since Coach Redknapp left, their new coach Hart is like a weeping Divorcee at a yard sale. Coach Wenger's guns on the other hand are well oiled and ready to go, he's like soccer's Macho Man Randy Savage but without the sunglasses ..... and hat.
Chet Predicts: 4-0
Birmingham v Stoke, 15:00
The Birmingham City Blues will have to alter tactics for this match, it won't be legs that need breaking but arms as they meet Rory Delap who lets his hands do the talking like some kind of ventriloquist that throws balls real far.
Chet Predicts: 1-2
Hull v Bolton, 15:00
This is exactly what we've waited so long for the soccer season for. Hull? Bolton? Have you ever cared about an outcome of a soccer match more? I know I have.
Chet Predicts: 0-0
Man City v Wolverhampton, 15:00
It's been said that some teams can't buy a win, Manchester City can. Wolves wouldn't even know what to do with money they'd probably spend it on meat and .... Kevin Doyle.
Chet Predicts: 4-1
Sunderland v Blackburn, 15:00
It seems odd to talk about Sunderland battling for survival so early in the season but against Coach Allardyce's Blackburn the same would be said of any team.
Chet Predicts: 2-2
Wigan v Man Utd, 15:00
If Manchester United ever did lose it would never be to a lesser team like Wigan, they're too good for that. As a matter of fact if United lose a match this season I'd be surprised.
Chet Predicts: 0-1
Burnley v Everton, 15:00
Everton as ever will show they have the kind of team spirit that will in no way be affected by transfer speculation, I'm beginning to wonder if they'll concede at all this season. Burnley on the other hand have shown what an awful team they are by not being recognised by me. I'd be willing to bet they don't score a win all season.
Chet Predicts: 0-2
Fulham v Chelsea, 16:00
When the two biggest clubs in london collide there will be fireworks, unfortunately though this is Fulham vs Chelsea not Fulham Vs Arsenal. Chelsea won't be able to resist the irresistable Clint Dempsey as he breaks down their resistance.
Chet Predicts: 2-1
West Ham v Tottenham, 13:30
This will be a little like a derby as both teams have ham in their names, Tottenham don't like it.
Chet Predicts: 0-2
Liverpool v Aston Villa, 20:00
If signing players was an art Martin O'Neill's finger paintings wouldn't stand a chance against Liverpool's masterpieces. Steve Gerrard will be the maestro in this affair, all the players will dance to the music he chooses .... Or else.
Chet Predicts: 1-2
Tuesday 25 August 2009
Chet Predicts 15/08/09
The Spanner here with all your soccer action,
Few could've imagined that soccer would catch on in America the way it has, that's down to one man, David Beckham.
I mean the commitment of the guy having to be restrained from his adoring fans? That kind of passion is infectious.
There may have been other things happen in the draft window but none more significant than Manchester becoming so rich they split into two seperate teams, both with massive squads and seperate histories - Soccer's crazy.
Chelsea vs Hull
Phil Brown has had the devil's work trying to drag people to Hull. Nobody wants to go to Hull, it's basically what christianity has built it's foundation on. Not even Chelsea want to go to Hull, that's why this match is in London. Their star player Dean Windass must be counting his lucky stars he escaped to Darlington.
Chet's prediction 3-0
Blackburn vs Man city
People have called Manchester City's players mercenaries and not even the good kind like John Rambo, the bad kind that don't even kill people for money. Lets be honest though we all only do things for the money, except maybe Mother Theresa and Ghandi and what did they drive? Ferraris? Lamborghinis? I think not, losers. Blackburn the most Non PC team in the premiership league return, anything they've done in the draft window is totally irrelevant, they can't beat Man City, they're rich.
Chet's veridict 1-£5m
Bolton vs Sunderland
This will be the best fight of the night I predict 12 rounds of great boxing action and perhaps even ten minutes of soccer. Awesome!
Chet's verdict 2-2
Portsmouth vs Fulham
Portsmouth are broke and Clint Dempsey plays for Fulham - You do the math.
Chet's verdict 1-3
stoke vs Burnley
What exactly is a Burnley? Whatever it is it'll stand no chance against Quarter-Back Delaps' powerful throw, nothing does.
Chet's verdict 2-1
Wolves vs Westham
West Ham must be crazy. I mean it's one thing to be good at soccer it's another to take on wolves. I mean a pack of wolves aren't really gonna play soccer are they? Surely they'll just attack the other team's players ... Like Birmingham City.
Chet's verdict 2-2
Everton vs Arsenal
Everton are clinging on to Joleon Lescott like those couples at high school where the guy's a geek and the girl's smokin' hot, they leave school and some good lookin' guy with lots of money comes into the picture ..... Oh Julia why did you leave me ?..... Anyway. They'll be looking to get the best of Coach Wengers pack of fragile, fragile europeans who perhaps should have "hold this way up" on their jerseys to avoid a repeat of last season.
Chet's verdict 2-1
Tottenham vs Liverpool
David Bentley has got to be the driving force in this one, I expect a big impact from this guy. Liverpool will be running scared whilst their captain Steve Gerrard is still a doubt, any injury that can stop this guy from playing for his country in a friendly must be near fatal, or worse.
Chet's verdict 1-1
Manchester United vs Birmingham City
Birmingham City Blues back at the top again, it's right where they belong every second season. If breaking legs won you the league they'd be worthy champions, unfortunately it doesn't and the United Manchester have such a big squad the Blues could break legs all day and still won't be able to defeat them, knowing Birmigham City like I do though they'll try their very best, good luck to 'em.
Chet's verdict 4-0
Aston Villa vs Wigan
Aston Villa have never beaten Wigan in the history of soccer and probably never will until Saturday when they will beat them convincingly. With Brad Guzan and Brad Friedel on the pitch the Wigans won't stand a chance.
Chet's verdict 3-0
Few could've imagined that soccer would catch on in America the way it has, that's down to one man, David Beckham.
I mean the commitment of the guy having to be restrained from his adoring fans? That kind of passion is infectious.
There may have been other things happen in the draft window but none more significant than Manchester becoming so rich they split into two seperate teams, both with massive squads and seperate histories - Soccer's crazy.
Chelsea vs Hull
Phil Brown has had the devil's work trying to drag people to Hull. Nobody wants to go to Hull, it's basically what christianity has built it's foundation on. Not even Chelsea want to go to Hull, that's why this match is in London. Their star player Dean Windass must be counting his lucky stars he escaped to Darlington.
Chet's prediction 3-0
Blackburn vs Man city
People have called Manchester City's players mercenaries and not even the good kind like John Rambo, the bad kind that don't even kill people for money. Lets be honest though we all only do things for the money, except maybe Mother Theresa and Ghandi and what did they drive? Ferraris? Lamborghinis? I think not, losers. Blackburn the most Non PC team in the premiership league return, anything they've done in the draft window is totally irrelevant, they can't beat Man City, they're rich.
Chet's veridict 1-£5m
Bolton vs Sunderland
This will be the best fight of the night I predict 12 rounds of great boxing action and perhaps even ten minutes of soccer. Awesome!
Chet's verdict 2-2
Portsmouth vs Fulham
Portsmouth are broke and Clint Dempsey plays for Fulham - You do the math.
Chet's verdict 1-3
stoke vs Burnley
What exactly is a Burnley? Whatever it is it'll stand no chance against Quarter-Back Delaps' powerful throw, nothing does.
Chet's verdict 2-1
Wolves vs Westham
West Ham must be crazy. I mean it's one thing to be good at soccer it's another to take on wolves. I mean a pack of wolves aren't really gonna play soccer are they? Surely they'll just attack the other team's players ... Like Birmingham City.
Chet's verdict 2-2
Everton vs Arsenal
Everton are clinging on to Joleon Lescott like those couples at high school where the guy's a geek and the girl's smokin' hot, they leave school and some good lookin' guy with lots of money comes into the picture ..... Oh Julia why did you leave me ?..... Anyway. They'll be looking to get the best of Coach Wengers pack of fragile, fragile europeans who perhaps should have "hold this way up" on their jerseys to avoid a repeat of last season.
Chet's verdict 2-1
Tottenham vs Liverpool
David Bentley has got to be the driving force in this one, I expect a big impact from this guy. Liverpool will be running scared whilst their captain Steve Gerrard is still a doubt, any injury that can stop this guy from playing for his country in a friendly must be near fatal, or worse.
Chet's verdict 1-1
Manchester United vs Birmingham City
Birmingham City Blues back at the top again, it's right where they belong every second season. If breaking legs won you the league they'd be worthy champions, unfortunately it doesn't and the United Manchester have such a big squad the Blues could break legs all day and still won't be able to defeat them, knowing Birmigham City like I do though they'll try their very best, good luck to 'em.
Chet's verdict 4-0
Aston Villa vs Wigan
Aston Villa have never beaten Wigan in the history of soccer and probably never will until Saturday when they will beat them convincingly. With Brad Guzan and Brad Friedel on the pitch the Wigans won't stand a chance.
Chet's verdict 3-0
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