Tuesday, 25 August 2009

Chet Predicts 22/08/09

Arsenal v Portsmouth, 15:00
Portsmouth seem a broken team since Coach Redknapp left, their new coach Hart is like a weeping Divorcee at a yard sale. Coach Wenger's guns on the other hand are well oiled and ready to go, he's like soccer's Macho Man Randy Savage but without the sunglasses ..... and hat.
Chet Predicts: 4-0

Birmingham v Stoke, 15:00
The Birmingham City Blues will have to alter tactics for this match, it won't be legs that need breaking but arms as they meet Rory Delap who lets his hands do the talking like some kind of ventriloquist that throws balls real far.
Chet Predicts: 1-2

Hull v Bolton, 15:00
This is exactly what we've waited so long for the soccer season for. Hull? Bolton? Have you ever cared about an outcome of a soccer match more? I know I have.
Chet Predicts: 0-0

Man City v Wolverhampton, 15:00
It's been said that some teams can't buy a win, Manchester City can. Wolves wouldn't even know what to do with money they'd probably spend it on meat and .... Kevin Doyle.
Chet Predicts: 4-1

Sunderland v Blackburn, 15:00
It seems odd to talk about Sunderland battling for survival so early in the season but against Coach Allardyce's Blackburn the same would be said of any team.
Chet Predicts: 2-2

Wigan v Man Utd, 15:00
If Manchester United ever did lose it would never be to a lesser team like Wigan, they're too good for that. As a matter of fact if United lose a match this season I'd be surprised.
Chet Predicts: 0-1

Burnley v Everton, 15:00
Everton as ever will show they have the kind of team spirit that will in no way be affected by transfer speculation, I'm beginning to wonder if they'll concede at all this season. Burnley on the other hand have shown what an awful team they are by not being recognised by me. I'd be willing to bet they don't score a win all season.
Chet Predicts: 0-2

Fulham v Chelsea, 16:00
When the two biggest clubs in london collide there will be fireworks, unfortunately though this is Fulham vs Chelsea not Fulham Vs Arsenal. Chelsea won't be able to resist the irresistable Clint Dempsey as he breaks down their resistance.
Chet Predicts: 2-1

West Ham v Tottenham, 13:30
This will be a little like a derby as both teams have ham in their names, Tottenham don't like it.
Chet Predicts: 0-2

Liverpool v Aston Villa, 20:00
If signing players was an art Martin O'Neill's finger paintings wouldn't stand a chance against Liverpool's masterpieces. Steve Gerrard will be the maestro in this affair, all the players will dance to the music he chooses .... Or else.
Chet Predicts: 1-2

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